Conquering the Barbarian Altanis: Session 85


Character Class Description
Hagar the Hewer Dwarf level 2 Imagine Conan as dwarf.
Ambros Cleric level 2 Follower of Aniu, Lord of Time.
Bob the Dwarf Dwarf level 1 Midget with big beard in search of an adventure.
Vyrkainen Elf level 1 Has stunning long, flowing black hair which attracts many fair maidens who exploit his generosity and leave him destitute.

Dewsnap 2nd, Airday

“Kyle manor? Yes, just follow the trail north-west. You can't miss it!”

True, they reached a three-story estate surrounded by acres of farmland, hunting grounds, and an orange groove after a brief walk.

“We are here to offer our help to esteemed Lord Kyle!”

Vyrkainen, the newest recruit quickly demonstrated his worth by applying his famous (notorious?) silver tongue. The elf showed up in Midway looking employment for he was left coinless after his latest fling in a thorp nearby. Hagar the Generous spent a good amount on getting the elf better armed, armoured, and equipped.

“Welcome to my humble abode!” a man in his early twenties greeted the party. “Please, join me for supper. I'd like to learn more about your accomplishments and adventures. Hold back no detail, my good friends!”

Kyle family is the most affluent one in the fifteen mile radius. Young lord recently took over after his father passed away. His politeness and openness was in stark contrast to treatment given by Hara's most powerful families.

“I had my face bitten off and I survived.” Bob boasted.

“Uh, ignore my friend over here...” Hagar interjected, and shared his exploits of breaking the spy ring in Hara, surviving many expeditions to various dungeons, and more. His humbleness and insistence to give credit where credit is due made lord Kyle cheer and rain compliments upon the dwarf.

In turn, Vyrkainen made sure to praise and encourage the young lord at every opportunity. As the wine was flowing so was the conversation.

“Friends, I've recently discovered my family owns the Cedarwade keep. Yes! The fort that held back barbarian hordes in olden days! That one!”

“Alas, woe is me! I have sent my men to inspect it and they were shocked to find it inhabited by disgusting hobgoblins. They wouldn't return no matter how much I offered them!”

“Friends, is that something you could take care of? I'd be immensely grateful for that!”

“Dear Lord, of course!” Vyrkainen chirped “Now, if only I had some sort of ranged weapon for this dangerous mission... A bow perhaps...” he continued.

“Master Elf, worry not!” Kyle boasted, nearly falling off the chair “You shall have my finest hunting bow! And one—nay!, two full quivers!”

“Your generosity knows no bounds, my Lord!”

Young man was quite inebriated by this point, unlike the dwarves who kept guzzling whatever alcohol was made available to them. Unfortunately, that also meant that they weren't able to learn more about the keep.

“Friends, I must excuse myself. I had too much drink, too much excitement. You have greatly regaled me with your tales. Please, stay the night. If you so desire, tomorrow you can look through the archives and see if you can find anything of interest about the keep.”

Indeed, adventurers accepted the Lord's offer, slept well, and spent the next day rummaging through old parchments. They found out that the keep is at least a hundred years old, has rectangular shape with four towers on each corner and gatehouse facing south, and is designed to be efficiently manned by 24 persons. There should be a well connected to underground stream, as well as a small underground dungeon. It was not clear if the latter had been built or just planned.

Dewsnap 4th–7th

Following the trail upstream river Cedarwade led the party to the Lord Kyle's keep. It was just like on the plans: a square-shaped fort with four towers and a gatehouse. What wasn't on the plans is that it is situated in a clearing approximately 300 yards wide.

The party kept a low profile and circled the keep sticking to the treeline. Thus they found out that each tower is manned with two humanoid shapes holding long-shafted weapons, and that the gatehouse doors are missing. The opening was blocked by two wagons parked sideways.

Adventurers found a safe spot to camp and keep an eye on the fort. They spent three days observing it. By doing so they learned that there is more activity during night than day, that sometimes smoke comes out of north and west side, and that tower guards operate in at least three shifts.

“Don't they go hunting? Or anything? How weird is this...”

During that time no one came out of the keep itself.

That is, until the third night, when two humanoids came out and stopped some fifty feet away from the gates. They prodded the ground ahead of them, covering area roughly 200 feet wide. And then they returned to the keep.

Feeling like they learned enough, the party headed back to Midway.

Dewsnap 7th, Waterday

“I don't trust Lord Kyle. What if he was misinformed? What if these are just some innocent blokes that moved in and are making an honest living?” Bob shared.

“Whatever the situation, they are obviously quite organised. They have watches, they have blocked the entrance, and from the last thing we've seen, they might have also set up traps.”

Vyrkainen was the one to report the state of matters to Lord Kyle. Young man stroked him temples, frowning with great worry.

“Friends, these are not good news. How do we solve this? Can you take care of this?”

“Yes!” the party reassured him. “But we will need more resources to get it done.”

“Whatever you need, I'll cover the expenses. You will stay at the Lonesome Drake Inn. For equipment go to Osgood, just tell her I will take care of the bill.”

The party left Kyle estate and headed back to Midway. There were plans to be made.

“Hey, I want to visit this store. Maybe they have things that would help us see better.” Bob pointed.

This store being “Tinker's Trinkets,” run by Tinker the Gnome, a retired adventurer hailing from Ractuan. All he had to offer was overpriced junk and a promise to “show you the good things” but only if they pay the showing price first. Such generous offer was quickly shot down by the party.

“Could you get us a spyglass?”

“Of course! You pay now and I get it for you!”


“Oh, who knows? Maybe tomorrow, maybe in a week, maybe in a year!”

“Bah, forget about it.”

“Your dwarven friend here...” Tinker pointed to Hagar “Yes, the one with big muscles... Would you be willing to sell the spear?”

“No, thank you.”

“Come on, I'll give you fifty gold coins and a magical ointment which makes you see further!”

“No, thank you.”

Adventurers retreated to rest and wind down at the Lonesome Drake Inn. Alas, no rest to be had there, either!

Boris, the proprietor, asked if they could help him with a problem. After they nodded, he invited them to his room, to speak in private. Then he had to suffer a bunch of sexual innuendos, before sharing his issue.

“Uh, I heard you are working with Lord Kyle. My problem is, uh, smaller, but still... You see, I was renovating my cellar, and, uh, how to say this, I, hm, uh, I... I found a secret doors behind a heavy closet. They are thick, reinforced, had a padlock and bolted bar.”

“Of course, we would be happy to help. But we must discuss compensation, our dear friend.”

“Yes, yes, of course. Would fifty gold coins suffice?”

“To open the doors? Yes! But, if there happens to be a pile of unguarded treasure behind those doors, then we claim half of it!”

“What! This is my cellar! Thirty percent and no more!”

“Forty percent and we have a deal!”


Bob yawned audibly.

“OK, we'll look into it the next thing tomorrow.”

“Nooo, can't you look into it right now? Please? Come on... I haven't been able to sleep ever since I found the doors!”

“OK, OK, stop whining. We will do it right now.”

“Great! Please follow me!”

The doors were just as Boris described them.

“Now, these look like something designed to keep something in!”

“What... why would you say that?! Oh my!” Boris went pale.

“Calm down, we will take care of it.”

Hagar broke the padlock with a might swing. Next he spent nearly an hour bending and banging on the bolt. All the while Bob kept an ear to the nearby wall, trying to hear if anything makes a sound on the other side.


Adventurers pulled the doors open... A whiff of stale, damp air came to them. A low, dug tunnel presented itself. Not a fifty feet in, and the tunnel broke into a natural cave tunnel perpendicular to it.

“Left or right?”

“Flip a coin.”


The party moved, followed by Boris carrying a lit torch.



Boris gasped audibly, and went even paler than before.

They stood at the ledge overseeing a large cave; larger than their torchlight could reach. The floor was littered with bones, skulls, totems, and fetishes. Every ten feet or so was an upright spear with a skull on top and something hanging from it.

“This is perfectly normal, calm down Boris. We will investigate.”

The party backtracked and explored the other direction.

This time they ran into a bunch of boulders blocking way forward. These were obviously brought here from somewhere else.

“I see something...”

Indeed, a top of the door frame could be seen behind the boulders.

“There is something carved above the doors...” Vyrkainen spotted.

“Great, you are good at languages. How about you go read it?”

“Who, me? Sure, why not.”

The elf got on all fours and begun his climb. The dwarves followed.

“It's an orcish script... language too...”

“What does it say?”

“Turbish. That's an orc name.”

Is this a tomb or a throne room?

Only one way to find out.

Discuss at Dragonsfoot forum.

#Wilderlands #SessionReport

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